Today I want to share something personal with you.

I found myself on my knees last April, begging God to take my life.
What spawned this dark moment, makes no sense to me, even to this day.
I had been disappointed by a very fixable error I made while processing a hair products order. Perhaps the pressures of life weighed so heavily on me that night that my heart had no room for any more failures, but this mistake was enough to convince me of the lies I’ve been hearing in my heart; lies that said I am not worthy of any success and therefore not worth living.
It was my darkest moment.
I had stopped creating videos and blog posts and generally became more and more insular in my thinking. I lacked energy and self-confidence all the time. I was extremely negative.
Even so, it took me nearly 9 months after that moment, to realize and acknowledge that I was suffering from depression.
Before then, I thought my negativity, the lack of “joie de vivre’,  and intense self-criticism was just a part of my evolving personality, but I was very wrong.
Once I recognized I was going through something that would need the expertise of a professional,  I started seeing a therapist. She diagnosed my condition as dysthymia.
Although my therapy was for a short period, it provided the language I needed to talk about my condition and to understand that what i was experiencing was real, but it wasn’t me.
Over these past couple of months, I’ve noticed a slow, but gradual shift in my depression. I credit this getting better to a few things which I’ve shared below:
1. Doing a Candida/parasite cleanse regularly.
DISCLAIMER: I’m not a doctor. Please seek out medical advice about this before doing what I did.
A series of stomach problems last year + symptoms (see linked articles for more info) led me to believe that I might be dealing with some intestinal parasite and/or candida. I stumbled upon these websites that seemed to confirm it: OrganicOlivia.com, this and this.
Soon after this I looked into buying an herbal cleanse. Here is what I used:
I now use this cleanse, since it’s more compact (also less expensive) and I’ve done Dr. Clarks full regimen a few times already.
After taking Dr. Clarks herbs the first time, I felt at least 15% better mentally- yes mentally. Not to mention, my stomach issues went away until of course I noticed the symptoms came back (due to the pernicious nature of yeast and parasites) months later. Each time I do it, I feel better incrementally better in mind and body.
Cleansing has decreased my depression by 25%.
I determined that my battle with depression had at least a bit of its roots in my body fighting other things, so since incorporating this particular, easy to do, herbal cleanse every 6-8 weeks or so I’ve seen notable improvement in my mental health and body health.


2. Taking prenatal vitamins and St. John’s Wort.

I continued taking prenatal vitamins after birth for months, but stopped for a while. After feeling extremely exhausted a few days in a row, I remembered throughout pregnancy I was instructed to keep my iron levels up. I decided in that vein to get on some iron, and then switch to a prenatal grade multi-vitamin which I felt would resolve any iron deficiency issues for good since it contains higher than normal vitamin and mineral contents. As I’m not pregnant, I’m sure it has more than enough of what I need.

Here is the brand I now use:

Rainbow Lite Prenatal Vitamins

When I take my vitamins consistently (at least every other day), I notice a 10% improvement in my mood.

St. John’s Wort is an herb that helps boost mood. Check out this article on WebMD about it.

I read that it has the same level of effectiveness as an anti-depressant if one doesn’t suffer from more major forms of depression and mental illness.

Nowadays I hardly use it, because I feel that much better, but when I felt a hard day coming I would take St. John’s Wort and guess what, it would totally curb and taper my negative mood! I was amazed that there was something natural I can use that would help shift my mood on a chemical level.

The brand I use is Vitastrength. Check it out here.

3. Exercising as regularly as possible.

I got more serious about exercising after I read a book about how rich people think and live. I told my husband that I wanted an elliptical machine in my workshop, that way I wouldn’t have to travel to exercise.

When I used the elliptical 3x a week at 30-45mins each time, I saw a very notable difference in my mood, comparable to the feeling I get when I cleanse every few months.

My version was found through craigslist and is an older model.

Link to similar elliptical below:

Elliptical

4. Psychotherapy 

I didn’t do therapy for long, however it was very helpful. She was the one that diagnosed me with dysthymia. Once she confirmed I was dealing with something that wasn’t just a part of my personality With her help, I was able to identify some of the hang ups and issues contributing to my depression.

The therapist I found is Seattle based, and I loved her kind spirit and the fact that she seemed very relatable, in part because she was black and a woman.

Contact for Therapist:

Jenny Henderson and her email is jhenders1511@sbcglobal.net

Now, you definitely don’t have to chose her for therapy, but just in case you’re looking for a professional right now- reach out to her.

5. Reading His Robe Or Mine

This book is pivotal to my daily recovery. It is reconnecting me to my faith and providing me with content which I can rest my mind on, even when things are tough.

This book for sure has lifted me so much. I saw a 25-30% improvement in my depression as a result of reading it every day.

Link to free PDF download below:

His Robe Or Mine

Transcript of This Video

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Transcript